Cranky Reviews

This Buzzer Beater is a Winner

Beer Type

15 to 20

15 to 20

Super Suds

Rating

IBU 25

Other Info

This Buzzer Beater is a Winner

Buzzer Beater

IX Poets Brewing Co.

5.2% Alcohol

Buzzer beaten.

It’s been quite a while since the Raptors had a real buzzer beater.* OG Anunoby’s 2020 Game 3 win over the Celtics was memorable. But the one any “We the North” fan will remember is Kawhi Leonard’s game 7 miracle shot that beat the 76ers and allowed them to move on and eventually win the NBA championship. These days it’s more like “Wee the North” although they did play well last night. Like JT said after that game “The Raptors are undefeated this year”.

A far as the Raptors’ “We the North” slogan goes it’s both grammatically and geographically incorrect. Of course, “We Are the North” or “We’re the North” don’t have any iconic cadence, and “We, the North” sounds like a stuffy lyric from a National Anthem. As far as geography goes, which is all the way around the world last time I looked, check out the map. Both Minneapolis and Portland are further North than Toronto. I would suspect that the Raptors pedantic fan base is relatively small, so not to worry.

This IX Poets pilsner is a tribute to Jack Armstrong, the venerable play by play colour sports caster for the Raptors. They call him “a modern day poet”. I don’t know about all that, but I will say this, he does know his stuff and keeps it interesting, which is more than I can say for 90% of the sportscasters out there who don’t know shit from Shinola.

When it comes to poetry, we will rhyme from time to time, while we do a brew review, and while our lines are still quite fine, we’re no poets, one through nine.

Game time! Can this brew score, and can it close? It has a clear a deep golden clear countenance, no foam at or about the rim. It has a malt crisp aroma, that’s definitely a pilsner on the nose. Hellooo! First quaff is an apple crisp malt mix, very refreshing. It has a crisp finish, a bit dry but not acerbic, get that acidic garbage outta here. ** Any fruit migrated South leaving  the malt bread body with a dry crisp finish for a classic pils. This brew can score and close.

*Editor’s Comment: We need to be very clear about this. COMDB does not condone the mistreatment of any animal regardless of its appearance or its nature. Buzzards are a member of the raptor family and are an endangered species. Although they may look gruesome and hunt cute rodents and small pets, and are often cast as villains in Disney movies, killing or beating a buzzard is illegal in North America.

*Reviewer’s Comment: The Toronto Raptors are an NBA basketball team, and it’s “buzzer beater” not “buzzard beater” you yahoo. And here I thought I’d get you all riled up with the “We the North” rant.

**Reviewer’s Comment: Jack Armstrong’s catch phrases are “Hellooo!” and “get that garbage outta here”.

Final Rating: Buzzer Beaten at 16 out of 20

Beer Type

15 to 20

15 to 20

Super Suds

Rating

Other Info

IBU 25

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