Ever sign up for a fitness program only to find that it wasn’t a good fit? Instead of getting fit you were getting fit to be tied? The missus and I signed up to a Goodlife fitness club many years ago, a short walk from our house. Just like a last call Tijuana tattoo, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Fortunately between our house and the club was Moose’s Big Game Sports Bar and after a workout we found that a frosty cold draft and a plate of wings was an ideal workout cool down regime. Eventually we found whenever we were short on time we would just go to the bar. Experiencing the good life without the fitness.
Some people are focused on looking good in a bikini or a speedo. Let me assure you, neither is a good look for us cranky old men. But I remember my kids signing up for the Beach Body program. Exercise, sweating, watching what you eat, may be good for some, but like most of us, these are all things that certainly don’t fit our lifestyle. And that beach sand gets everywhere, every crack, crevice and cranny. Everywhere.
So here at COMDB we developed a program not for the best of us, but for the rest of us. The Beach Ball Body Program™.
Based on our extensive research into nutrition we found out that muscle is denser than fat. So we figured a pound of muscle is heavier than a pound of fat, right?*
So if you eat what you want (i.e.: chips and dip) and drink what you want (i.e.: craft beer) and do the physical activity you want (i.e.: not exercising) and gradually replace muscle with fat you should lose or at least maintain your present body weight. You don’t need much muscle to pull in a 4-pound bass now do you.** So far the program has been working out, and we haven’t.
Physical activity is important, and we have found that fishing, bowling, curling, shuffleboard, darts and pinball are all activities you can do while drinking, multi-casking so to speak. Thereby ensuring that none of these strenuous activities will build muscle. The beer is an important part of the equation as it ensures you preserve your BMI (Beer Mass Index).
Trade that muscle for fat and watch those pounds shift and save money too. *** The only thing the Beach Ball Body Program™ will cost you is your self respect.
Beach Ball Body Program™ Testimonials
Don’t just take our word for it, listen to some of our satisfied customers. All true statements from real people, not at all made up.
“This is the only weight management program I have tried to date that made me happier.”
O. Bees
“No cardio, thank God.”
Art. A. Tack
“The only program I know that recognizes beer as one of the 4 basic food groups. What’s not to love.”
B.R. Gut
*Editor’s Comment: It appears that our reviewer is denser than both muscle and fat.
**Editor’s Comment: In your case, you don’t need a healthy body to pull in a 4 pound bass, just a healthy imagination. I recommend you read the book by Artie Lange entitled “Too Fat to Fish”.
***Editor’s Comment: A Beach Body on Demand (virtual) membership costs $120 per year. The Beach Ball Body Program™ costs nothing and you get what you pay for.
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